One year ago

Now that the whirlwind of the birthday party is over and Jonathan is back in town (we missed him last week!) I've had a little time to reflect on our survival of the first year as parents to our precious boys. What a year, and how fast it went, and how different our lives are today from a year ago (okay, a little over a year ago).

* I've read about "surviving your first year with twins" and it made me think about that word. Yes, the beginning was definitely about survival. It was a never-ending cycle of feeding and sleeping, and contrary to my naive beliefs, those two things don't necessarily just "happen." :)  There have definitely been rough spots, and I don't think I ever told anyone but I cried the first week after Erin left. I still am so thankful that I had her help the first three months, because I don't know how I would have gotten both boys fed without her; she was a sanity saver. But yes, in the beginning there was some crying and questioning whether or not I could do it, and feelings of isolation.  After a bit of a learning curve though, we got a good routine going and started getting more continuous sleep and it's been about a lot more than just survival. And it was never the babies; it was always me feeling inadequate as a new mom. Their sweet smiles, precious little breaths, soft skin, chubby hands, giggles and babbling...they are little miracles and we are truly blessed by how good they are!  

* Things I miss from a year ago: I miss being able to go to movies whenever we want. I also miss going out for nice dinners, but we have generally been able to take the boys out to eat, so I don't miss dining out as much as the movies. Maybe it's just the freedom of being able to go out on a whim that I miss. But honestly, that's about it. My life is still a hundred times richer than it was a year ago.

* I am amazed at what the human body is capable of. Sometimes I'll look at Jonathan and gush over how awesome the human body is. I mean, I carried two babies for nine months, grew them inside my belly, birthed them, and fed them for a year. That we can create breastmilk that completely nourishes our babies is just amazing to me.

* I am learning to be more flexible and patient. I thought I was patient before; I've always worked with kids, and with special-needs kids, so I really thought I had an abundance of patience. But throw a couple of babies who refuse to eat at me and I'm suddenly a crazy woman who throws bottles in frustration with tears streaming down my face. This year has taught me that I really have very little control in life, and it's up to me to be flexible and roll with it. So I'm definitely getting better at accepting things I cannot change, not to mention improvising when plans go awry, as they are wont to do with two active little boys to corral. :)

* We eat home-cooked meals soooo much more than we used to. I really had no choice but to start cooking, if I wanted Ben & Jack to get all the food groups they are supposed to have each day, which I do. So it's made me branch out, learn new recipes, figure out how to use a slow cooker, and basically have meals ready to go instead of eating out or ordering in. I never really enjoyed cooking much, but I'm finding that it's easier to cook for a family, especially if we are eating left-overs, and I am actually gaining a lot of satisfaction from providing well-rounded meals for my boys. 

* I love my husband (even more). Jonathan had no choice but to be a hands-on dad from day one. We have frequently talked about how much more involved he is with our boys than he might have been with a singleton. Even though it was hard because neither of us really got to sleep in ever, or take a feeding off those first few months, it's been nice to spend that time together and feel like a team. We make a pretty good one :)

* One year later, and I feel like I'm finding time for myself again. I've missed my own pursuits, like working and scrapbooking, but I've also found other creative outlets like this blog and the one-year slideshow. Those have been fun. Life is a little different now, and finding a balance between all things baby and me-time will take a little time, but it's the best life I could imagine.

So happy one year Ben & Jack. You've given me the gift of becoming a mother, and made me a better person for it. I can't imagine my life without my silly, sweet baby boys.

Birthday Party

I think the birthday party was a success! We had Ben & Jack's first year birthday party at the Frontiers of Flight Museum in Dallas. We decided on the airplane theme since that is their nursery decor. I got a lot of fun ideas online and off Pinterest and had so much fun planning all the little details. One of my favorites was the double balloons (blue inside clear) to represent the sky, and the cute little cookie favors that said "thanks for flying with us!" We contacted a friend of the family's and her cookies are divine. I also loved Courtney's onesies she custom made for us - her website is www.thepaisleyabbey.com. She made quite a few of our infant onesies & bibs and it's all been fabulous.

Here's a couple of pictures of the party decor:

The whole thing felt like a whirlwind of activity, putting everything up then taking it down as fast as we could for the next party, so we didn't get nearly enough pictures. But we did take a few crowd shots.

I wish I could claim all of these shots - but these are courtesy of J's Uncle Don's photography skills :)

I can totally understand why you would want to have your first birthday party at home. We sort of had the odds stacked against us, since not only were the boys in a new place with a big crowd, but it was nap time and they were a little tired. So I just tried to go with the "it's my party and I'll cry if I want to" frame of mind :) The boys were a little unsure of everything and not their usual sunny selves, but that's okay; they still had a fun time sampling some of the snacks and visiting with friends & family. They were not into smashing their birthday cakes, so we didn't push that. Instead I gave them cupcakes the next day at home for them to make a big mess. :) Also, my little cardboard airplanes were a total bust. I still don't know what I did wrong, because they worked at home, but I'm keeping them for pretend play. We'll get use out of them, yet! 

Jack & Ben took a 20 minute nap on the way home and then refused to go back to sleep, continuing with the "it's my party" mantra. But luckily they were really happy to be home! Perhaps it was the crazy amount of presents taking over our living room that they got to tear into, but they were happy little men in the afternoon! I think we opened gifts in three shifts, which was a lot of fun. They loved the giant bags and shaking around the tissue paper, and they have really enjoyed their new toys this week! Luckily their Auntin Erin was here this week to help me clean out closets & drawers to make way for the new stuff. Our friends and family were all far too generous, and J & B are lucky little guys. I have to point out the picture below of the boys with their cousins. Happy little Cooper & sweet energetic Connor were here to have fun and I just love seeing all the boys together!

I put together a one-year slideshow for Ben & Jack and Jonathan borrowed a projector & travel screen from work so that we could play it. It worked beautifully at home! However in the noisy museum you couldn't quite hear the music & the screen wasn't in the best position for others to see. So I'm including it below. I've probably watched it a hundred times, and only just recently stopped crying every time I saw their baby pictures in the slideshow. My, how fast a year can fly by! Also, I can't help but point out that sacrifices were made to create this slideshow. Not all mom-pictures are flattering, but I did it for you, boys.

Thanks to all of our wonderful friends & family who took the time to celebrate this past year with us. We are grateful to have you in the lives of our sweet boys and love you all :)

One year olds

Today my babies turn one year old. It's hard to believe that a whole year has gone by. I've always heard that time flies once you have babies / when they are little, and it is really so, so true. I am hoping that part of the "flying" was due to my post-partum haze and limited sleep those first few months, and that this next year will maybe not go quite so fast. But regardless, what a year it has been! Best of my life, and Jonathan's, if I can speak for him too (and I think I can). Sweet boys, you have no idea how loved you are, and how blessed we are that you are in our lives. Happy Birthday!

Here are my little loves with their elephants - their last elephant progression pic!

Jack at 1 year:
Height: 30" (53%)
Weight: 19 lbs 7 oz (8%)
Head size:  18" (25%)

Diaper: size 4 

Clothes size: 12-18 months (a little big on Jack, but I like keeping them in the same size)

Favorite foods: Carbs! Jack loves bread & crackers. He also loves cheese, pizza, quesadillas, yogurt, cheerios, chicken, puffs, & yogurt bites. He is so funny when feeding himself, because he will stuff bites into his little mouth until he can fit nothing more. It is amazing that he doesn't choke himself.

Favorite song: Itsy Bitsy Spider

Favorite book: Brown Bear, Brown Bear

*Mr. Independent - Jack is good at entertaining himself, whereas Ben more frequently looks to interact or seek attention from us.

*Pulling up all over the place, and is SO quick when he crawls!

*Can say "mama" (mostly at me when he wants something) and "dada" sometimes, and "ball!" I swear the other day he was trying to say "duck" when we were reading a book.

*He has started expressing displeasure by kicking and swinging his legs when I pick him up from something. Awesome.

*SO smart & inquisitive; he initiates/makes up games and figures things out / problem solves like nobody's business. I love watching him learn new things.
*Active & busy - always doing something

*Continues to be our little rascal, and growls all the time :) 

*He tends to be the leader, mostly leading his sweet brother into trouble or meddling where they shouldn't be, like into the DVDs or the t.v. stand or down the hall.

*Very social with others, especially babies or kids. He is forever smiling at kids (mostly girls! - Jonathan calls him our little ladies' man) when we go out to dinner and has always been interested in looking around and checking people out.

Ben at 1 year:

Height: 29.75" (50%)
Weight: 20 lb.s 11 oz (32%)
Head size:  18.25" (45%)

Diaper: size 4 

Clothes size: 12-18 months

Favorite foods: Protein - Ben loves chicken and cheese, and will happily stuff his mouth when he feeds himself. He also loves yogurt bites, yogurt, cheerios, mashed potatoes, bread, and puffs. Neither boys eat many fruits/veggies as solids, so we generally still do pureed jar food for those, but we keep trying.

Favorite song: Itsy Bitsy Spider

Favorite book: Brown Bear, Brown Bear

*Pulling up and standing on his own some! Loves to walk with us holding his hands.

*Can say "mama" (also mostly when he wants something from me) and "dada" sometimes, and can say "bye" although not always when you want him to :)

*Little snuggle bug! He gives the best hugs when he wakes up from naps, just lays his little head on your shoulder for a couple of minutes.

*Sensitive, smart, inquisitive. He loves to clap and will spend a lot of time figuring out something new. Love to watch his mind at work. 

*Ben is a happy little dude; he is mostly chill where ever we are (dinner, car, etc) and go-with-the-flow. He also loves to smile & laugh and will often make eye contact with us to start a smiling game ("get you," etc). He loves his brother and follows him around at home a lot. 

*Ben is our little social butterfly at home; he is more interested in "talking" or wrestling with us than his brother

*Ben has also started expressing displeasure, but is a little more "all in" than his brother, as he will arch his back and kick his legs and has even thrown himself down on the floor a couple of times! It probably doesn't help that I laugh when he does it.

*Proficient at crocodile tears - a lot of fake crying when he wants something, whereas Jack will just make angry sounds if he isn't getting his way

*A little bit of a momma's boy; Ben sticks a little closer to me than Jack does when we're out and about; for example at Little Gym he takes much longer to warm up and go explore, and even then he typically checks back to make sure I'm near; whereas once Jack warms up, he is off and I am free to follow him if I want :)

**Both boys are starting to really get into dancing, with shaking their heads (so cute!) and Jack twists his shoulders back & forth, while Ben more often shakes his whole body. I love it! We've started having daily dance parties when I can remember to get the music going. 

**They almost always wake up happy, which is just the best. They jabber to each other in their cribs and just smile and play in their cribs when I come in to get them. They are really happy and sweet baby boys; we are so blessed.

I sometimes can't imagine how I got chosen to be the mother of these amazing little boys. I still tell them almost daily how lucky I am that God chose me to be their mama.

Activities 17-21, and catching up

I'm late on these, and sorry for that. I decided to make time to blog today because last night, when Jonathan sat on the floor next to Buddy with his laptop open where I could see it, he went to our blog page and sighed heavily. Poor baby. So here we go!

Big news, we have a nanny! Nanny Mercedes comes Wednesday mornings to play and it has been so nice to have help. The boys L-O-V-E her, and when I'm getting things done around the house I can just hear them giggling and playing with her. After months of me working up to feel I could maybe trust someone else with them, weeks of searching, and even a couple of interviews, we found her and we love her! Our wonderful neighbor suggested contacting a friend of hers, for whom Mercedes has worked for 10 years, and it has worked out so well. Now I don't have to ask Jonathan to take off work when I need to go to the doctor, or take away from family time to get my hair done on Saturdays, or run errands to non-double-stroller-friendly shops at night when Jonathan is home, etc. etc.

In other big news, which also contributed to last week being so busy, we started our twin playgroup last month! Last week we hosted here and had 8 tiny bodies crawling around our living room. The boys graciously shared their toys :) and had a lot of fun! We've also met at the Arboretum - so fun to go outdoors. I'm so glad to have met these ladies and their little ones, and it's such a great social time for Ben & Jack.

On to the activities. These are actually from 2 weeks ago. I skipped the activity challenge last week because the weather had been so nice and we were so, so busy! I hadn't intended to skip an entire week, but when we skipped Monday to basically hang out outside all day (hello, Spring! You're early and we are so glad!) the rest of the week sort of followed.

Day 17: Cornmeal play, from www.rainbowswithinreach.blogspot.com. I would have never thought to let the babies play with cornmeal, but I could see how as they get older it would be neat to use for practicing letters, etc. As you can probably tell by the look on their faces, I think they thought it was kind of gross. They would look at their hands and frown as they moved their fingers to feel the cornmeal. It is rather grainy, but they had fun moving it around on their tray!

Day 18: Playing with the laundry basket! I figured since the boys looooove to throw out clothes from the laundry basket when I am trying to fold laundry, that they would maybe enjoy trying to throw balls into the basket. Jack, especially, loves to put small items in places, and I am forever finding him standing over his laundry basket looking at whatever he has dropped in or hanging on the gate looking at what he has dropped to the other side. But both of them like putting balls in their ball popper (or their shaker eggs, which prevent the ball popper from working) and I'll find little toys or balls in between the shutters and the windows (they love moving the shutters), etc. I love doing their laundry and getting to the bottom of the basket and finding odd toys that Jack has "put away." I am sure this is just the beginning of finding things in places they don't belong. :) They did enjoy this activity, and putting items into the basket was just as much fun as turning it upside-down to beat on the bottom.

Day 19: Jello in a pan, from www.playcreateexplore.com What fun! We have given the boys jello once before, at Luby's, but this was the first time they got to really go to town with squishing it and making a mess. They didn't really eat much of it, but they had a good time squishing cheerios into it and squeezing it through their fingers.

Day 20: Musical toy hide & seek, from www.clickpraylove.com. I basically started their musical mozart cube (or whatever its called) and "hid" it in places. The boys love hide & seek with me and this was sort of fun, too. It's harder with two, because they would distract each other during the game. Haha! But they did find it a few times!

Day 21: Fort. What kid doesn't like playing in a fort? I threw a big blanket over their bouncer, which they already love playing under, and they had a grand time. Actually, we had just come in from outside and I had given them their sippy cups, and they mostly just wanted to sit under their "fort" drinking from their cups. They're so funny! Upon checking out these photos, it would appear that I am a pretty terrible fort-maker. Oh, well, I'm sure my two active little boys will surpass my fort-making-skills in the future.

Activities 12-16

Day 12 we did Cardboard Box drop, from www.clickpraylove.com. We used a diaper box and dropped small items through the hole on the bottom. After the boys finished drumming, they did a great job pushing toys through the hole! Jack was really into this activity, long after Ben moved on :) Ben was doing a great job standing today.

Day 13 we did water beads from www.playathomemom3.blogspot.com. How cool are water beads? I'm fairly certain I was more excited about this than the boys were. We don't have a light table, so I tried using the iPad2 with the flashlight function underneath our dish of water beads, which worked pretty well. The boys were fascinated by these, but I think their ball pit skills took over; Ben was trying to spread the water beads around by waving his arms through the dish and Jack was spreading them around with his hands. It was pretty funny, and I didn't mind, until the boys started moving around on our sheet and squishing the balls with their hands and knees. These are supposedly non-toxic, but I still didn't want squished up water beads all over the place and possibly ingested. So the water beads went away, at least until Ben & Jack are able to observe boundaries and guidelines for exploratory play. Great sensory activity, though, and the boys were really interested in feeling them at first.

Day 14 was from the same site, and was sensory exploration with tinsel. We did it in a baby pool instead of the pack-n-play, since we kept the ball pit up. (I couldn't take it down - the boys love it!) I ought to just call this day "baby pool play," since the boys both bailed after I put in the tinsel. For whatever reason they were not into the tinsel. Ben warmed up to it and would get back in and pick up / feel the tinsel, but Jack stayed on the outside. After I put away all the tinsel, the boys had a blast with the baby pool! They loved climbing in and out, and Jack would crawl around, flip around, etc. He also frequently flipped it over himself and crawled around like a turtle - unintended, I think, although he would laugh when I took it off.

Day 15 was supposed to be cardboard box tunnel day. I am a cardboard box tunnel failure - couldn't make the sides stay up. I don't think I have a big enough box. Anyway, problem solved because I just ordered an inexpensive plastic tunnel. This one was great! Ben was a little unsure of going through at first, but Jack forged ahead and Ben followed suit. They had a good time looking at each other through the tunnel and peeking around to play peek-a-boo. Fun times!

Day 16 we did shoebox fun, idea from one of my books, Creative Resources for Infants and Toddlers. The idea was to let them open boxes, stack the boxes, put items inside (working on object permanence) and pour items in/out. They loved this one! Right now the boys are really into stacking, so getting to open the boxes and stack them and put the lids back on was their favorite thing to do.

Bathtime Fun

A few weeks back I started bathing the boys together. They had decided they didn't like baths before bedtime, maybe because that period is their longest awake time and they get tired/fussy at night. So I started  bathing them in the mornings, which means it's always by myself. Trying to attend to a baby in the bath while making sure his brother is also safe in the other room is difficult, so I thought this would be easier for all of us. At first it worked really well - they got more playtime while their brother was getting bathed. This past week they have again decided that baths are no fun. If I just let them play in the water without restraining them in their seats, they'd be fine! Unfortunately I have to make sure they don't drown and actually wash them and stuff. Sigh.

Anyway during their love of bath time, they would follow me into the bathroom and peer over the side of the tub. Jack would actually lift his leg like he was trying to get in. It was so funny! Their favorite things to do in the tub include chewing on their little sea animals/rubber duckies and pouring water from cups. This one is a pain, because sometimes they try to drink the bath water, yuck. They love to kick (mostly Jack) and splash (mostly Ben). Ben is totally easy-going about sharing space, getting splashed, etc, while Jack will whine if Ben's seat opens and touches his leg, or if Ben's foot touches his. Silly little men!

Activity Challenge Days 7-11

Day 7 we did a couch cushion obstacle course. Because the boys have been sick and missed Little Gym, I thought this would be a good substitution for today. They had a lot of fun! I did have a box tunnel, which didn't work out too well, seeing as how the boys thought it was fun to beat their hands on it and topple it over. They had a good time climbing over the cushions and following each other around, though.  :)

Day 8 we did Utility Paper Exploration, idea from www.playcreateexplore.com, off Pinterest. Most of my website ideas are all from Pinterest :)  I figured this would be well-received, since the boys enjoy tearing tissue paper. This one involved tissue paper, parchment paper, foil, saran wrap, and wax paper. They loved it! As usual, waving the paper around is fun, as well as trying to rip it and squash it. They weren't quite sure what to make of the saran wrap, and kept trying to tear it apart to no avail. Another activity that held their interest for a good while!

Day 9 we did finger painting with colored cool whip, this time in the bathtub to cut down on mess. This idea is from www.clickpraylove.com. I figured the boys would LOVE this one, since they love being in the bathtub so much. Alas, they did not really get into it and just kept trying to get out of the tub. Jonathan called this my "Activity Fail." I guess you can't win 'em all - maybe this will be better received when they are a little bit older.

Day 10 was dry oatmeal play, from www.playathomemom3.blogspot.com. Love this website! This was a good sensory activity. Once again, Benny was a little apprehensive - he would tentatively feel the oatmeal, then look at his hand, then look in the box. So funny! Jack, of course, dove right in; he liked to sweep his hand across and throw out some of the oatmeal. I think they liked the digging toys I put in the box better than the oatmeal itself. We had to keep the measuring spoons out a few days after this. Oh boys, wait until I put together my play therapy sand tray for you. We'll have some Jurassic sand, a sand sifter and scoop...what fun! Counting the days until they're old enough, but Jonathan is not too far off the mark when he says the sand tray may be more for me than for them. ;)

Finally, our fun Day 11 activity was the ball pit; idea from www.rookiemoms.com. I almost got this one out last week, I was so excited, but I wanted to wait until these colds were mostly gone so I didn't have to disinfect all of these balls. Luckily we have no fevers today, very little drainage, and just a few coughs. They loved this! At first they were stationary, just moving the balls around and kicking their feet. As they became more comfortable, they moved all around, climbed over one another, and stood up on the sides. Benny liked to try to gather as many balls as he could in his arms at once. Jack was more into kicking his legs and scooping the balls to one side. So much laughter during this activity! If only our house was a little bigger; I would leave this out all the time! Maybe it will be a fun Friday activity for us each week. :)

*Update: I did leave this out for a while and the boys loved it! The longer it was out the more new games they discovered. Jack discovered he could fall backwards into the ball pit. He started from a sitting position, then would slowly fall backwards, then he would pull up on the sides and fall backwards into the balls. He thought that was so funny! Ben would mimic him from the outside and lift his arms over his head and lean backwards in the bouncer when Jack would fall. :) Ben discovered that he could sort of "swim" in the balls and would sprawl across and bury himself in them. So cute. Then both boys discovered the magic of throwing balls out of the ball pit, which they thought was hilarious. Not as cute. Sadly the allure of the ball pit seems to have waned, so we will likely be taking it down this week but will stick with my original plan of putting it up occasionally. 

Peek-a-boo, Jack!