Growing

Jack made me cry last Thursday.

I was sitting in their room on the floor playing "stack the blocks...and tumble them down" with the boys and kept thinking Jack looked TALL! Sure enough, he stood next to Ben and I noticed he's at least an inch or two taller. I thought maybe I was just looking at them wrong, so we kept playing and I forgot about it.

Thursday night around 10:30 when I went in to check on them and re-tuck them in, Jack was standing in his crib and whimpered "mama" so I picked him up to rock him for a minute (such a tough life, I know). He layed his little head on my shoulder, and usually his knees come right to my lap but that night I had to turn him sideways across my body to make him fit - he's really grown a couple of inches! It's practically overnight - this must be what they call a growth spurt! At first I thought - okay, yeah, he did look taller today. Then I realized I'd never be able to hold him straight against my shoulder to rock again, he'll always have to be sideways now...until eventually he won't want to be rocked anymore or will be too big to rock. And Jonathan says that the Love You Forever mom is creepy when she rocks her grown child, so I'm pretty sure he won't let me do that. Anyway, I got a little teary thinking about how they are growing so fast.

And then, to make matters worse, I saw this little chart on Pinterest that broke down your child's years into stages: an infant for a year, toddler for 2 years, preschooler for 2 years, a child for 5 years, a preteen for 3 years, and a teen for 5 years. What?! Who wants to see that in black and white? Stupid Pinterest.

With all the terrible events this past week - Boston & West, and the personal loss of Jonathan's great-Aunt Teresa, it was a hard few days, which may be why I was so sensitive that night. When bad or difficult things happen, I try to remember to ask myself "What can I do about it?" Many times I just feel helpless with a hurting heart for others, but I can always pray, and I can remember to never take this crazy, wonderful life for granted. So for me, for right now, that means never taking our family for granted, maybe rocking my little boys a little bit longer at night, and embracing this new cross-body rocking before they outgrow this phase too :) 

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song. 

-Psalm 28:7